I haven't
ever spoken to you since about the vision--whatever it was--which
you described to me--the child and you. But I took you at your
word!"
"Yes," said Maud, "I have always been glad that you did that!"
"But I have wanted to speak," said Howard, "simply because I did
not want you to think that it wasn't in my mind--that I had cast it
all lightly away. I haven't tried to force myself into any belief
about it--it's a mystery--but it has grown into my mind somehow,
and become real; and I do feel more and more that there is
something very true and great about it, linking us with a life
beyond. It does seem to me life, and not silence; love, and not
emptiness. It has not come in between us, as I feared it might--or
rather it HAS come in between us, and seems to be holding both our
hands. I don't say that my reason tells me this--but something has
outrun my reason, and something stronger and better than reason. It
is near and dear: and, dearest, you will believe me when I say that
this isn't said to please you or to woo you--I wouldn't do that! I
am not in sight of the reality yet, as you have been; but it IS a
reality, and not a sweet dream."
Maud looked at him, her eyes brimming with sudden tears. "Ah, my
beloved," she said, "that is all and more than I had hoped. Let it
just stay there! I am not foolish about it, and indeed the further
away that it gets, the less I am sure what happened. I shall not
want you to speak of it: it isn't that it is too sacred--nothing is
too sacred--but it is just a fact I can't reckon with, like the
fact of one's own birth and death.
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