I suppose it was very
unmaidenly, but I was past that. Then there was that horrible
imitation; such a disgusting parody! and then I was prouder of you
than ever, because you really took it so well. I was too angry
after that for anything, and when you went off with father, and
Monica sketched and Jack lay down and smoked, Freddy Guthrie walked
off with me, and I said to him, 'I really cannot think how you
dared to do that--I think it was simply shameful!' Well, he got
quite white, and he did not attempt to excuse himself; and I
believe I said that if he did not put it straight with you, I would
never speak to him again: and then I rather repented; and then he
began making love to me, and said the sort of things people say in
books. Howard, I believe that people really do talk like books when
they get excited--at all events it was like a bad novel! But I was
very stern--I can be very stern when I am angry--and said I would
not hear another word, and would go straight back if he said any
more; and then he said something about wanting to be friends, and
wanting to have some hope; and then I got suddenly sorry about it
all--it seemed such a waste of time--and shook hands with him,
feeling as if I was acting in an absurd play, and said that of
course we were friends; and I think I insisted again on his
apologising to you, and he said that I seemed to care more for your
peace of mind than his; and I simply walked away and he followed,
and I shouldn't be surprised if he was crying; it was all like a
nightmare; but I did somehow contrive to make it up with him later,
and told him that I thought him a very nice boy indeed.
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