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Leacock, Stephen, 1869-1944

"My Discovery of England"

(See map). Kowfat, lying as the reader knows, on the
Kowfat River, occupies the hinterland between the back end of
south-west Somaliland and the east, that is to say, the west, bank
of Lake P'schu. It thus forms an enclave between the Dog Men of
Darfur and the Negritos of T'chk. The inhabitants of Kowfat are a
coloured race three quarters negroid and more than three quarters
tabloid.
"As a solution of the present difficulty, the first thing required
in our opinion is to send out a boundary commission to delineate
more exactly still just where Kowfat is. After that an ethnographical
survey might be completed."

It was a matter not only of concern but of surprise to me that not
one of the three contributions recited above was accepted by the
English Press. The Morning Post complained that my editorial was not
firm enough in tone, the Guardian that it was not humane enough, the
Times that I had left out the latitude and longitude always expected
by their readers. I thought it not worth while to bother to revise
the articles as I had meantime conceived the idea that the same
material might be used in the most delightfully amusing way as the
basis of a poem far Punch. Everybody knows the kind of verses that
are contributed to Punch by Sir Owen Seaman and Mr. Charles Graves
and men of that sort. And everybody has been struck, as I have, by
the extraordinary easiness of the performance.


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