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Thackeray, William Makepeace, 1811-1863

"Burlesques"

This morning,
in the presence of all the servants, you called me by the most vile,
abominable name, which heaven forbid I should repeat! You dismissed me
from your house under a false accusation. You sent me to this odious
convent to be immured for life. Be it so! I will not come back, because,
forsooth; you relent. Anything is better than a residence with a wicked,
coarse, violent, intoxicated, brutal monster like yourself. I remain
here for ever and blush to be obliged to sign myself
"THEODORA VON GODESBERG.
"P.S.--I hope you do not intend to keep all my best gowns, jewels, and
wearing-apparel; and make no doubt you dismissed me from your house in
order to make way for some vile hussy, whose eyes I would like to tear
out. T. V. G."

CHAPTER VII.
THE SENTENCE.

This singular document, illustrative of the passions of women at all
times, and particularly of the manners of the early ages, struck dismay
into the heart of the Margrave.
"Are her ladyship's insinuations correct?" asked the hermit, in a
severe tone. "To correct a wife with a cane is a venial, I may say a
justifiable practice; but to fling a bottle at her is ruin both to the
liquor and to her."
"But she sent a carving-knife at me first," said the heartbroken
husband. "O jealousy, cursed jealousy, why, why did I ever listen to thy
green and yellow tongue?"
"They quarrelled; but they loved each other sincerely," whispered Sir
Ludwig to the hermit: who began to deliver forthwith a lecture upon
family discord and marital authority, which would have sent his two
hearers to sleep, but for the arrival of the second messenger, whom the
Margrave had despatched to Cologne for his son.


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