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Thackeray, William Makepeace, 1811-1863

"Burlesques"

I delight not in scenes of blood, heaven
knows, but I was compelled in the course of a few weeks, and for the
sake of this one woman, to fight nine duels myself, and I know that four
times as many more took place concerning her.
I forgot to say that Jowler's wife was a half-caste woman, who had been
born and bred entirely in India, and whom the Colonel had married from
the house of her mother, a native. There were some singular rumors
abroad regarding this latter lady's history: it was reported that she
was the daughter of a native Rajah, and had been carried off by a poor
English subaltern in Lord Clive's time. The young man was killed very
soon after, and left his child with its mother. The black Prince forgave
his daughter and bequeathed to her a handsome sum of money. I suppose
that it was on this account that Jowler married Mrs. J., a creature who
had not, I do believe, a Christian name, or a single Christian quality:
she was a hideous, bloated, yellow creature, with a beard, black teeth,
and red eyes: she was fat, lying, ugly, and stingy--she hated and was
hated by all the world, and by her jolly husband as devoutly as by any
other. She did not pass a month in the year with him, but spent most
of her time with her native friends. I wonder how she could have given
birth to so lovely a creature as her daughter.


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