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Thackeray, William Makepeace, 1811-1863

"Burlesques"


He begann to give dinners, and thought nothin of partys to Greenwich
or Richmond. He didn't see his Hemily near so often: although the
hawdacious and misguided young man might have done so much more heasily
now than before: for now he kep a Broom!
"But there's a tumminus to hevery Railway. Fred's was approachin: in an
evil hour he began making TIME-BARGINGS. Let this be a warning to all
young fellers, and Fred's huntimely hend hoperate on them in a moral
pint of vu!
"You all know under what favrabble suckemstanses the Great Hafrican
Line, the Grand Niger Junction, or Gold Coast and Timbuctoo (Provishnal)
Hatmospheric Railway came out four weeks ago: deposit ninepence per
share of 20L. (six elephant's teeth, twelve tons of palm-oil, or
four healthy niggers, African currency)--the shares of this helegeble
investment rose to 1, 2, 3, in the Markit. A happy man was Fred when,
after paying down 100 ninepences (3L. 15s.), he sold his shares for
250L. He gave a dinner at the 'Star and Garter' that very day. I promise
you there was no Marsally THERE.
"Nex day they were up at 3 1/4. This put Fred in a rage: they rose to 5,
he was in a fewry. 'What an ass I was to sell,' said he, 'when all this
money was to be won!'
"'And so you WERE an Ass,' said his partiklar friend, Colonel Claw,
K.


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