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Thackeray, William Makepeace, 1811-1863

"Burlesques"

I kep on talking to her (she sobbing and going
hon hall the time) till Lady Hangelina herself came up--'The real Siming
Pewer,' as they say in the play.
"There they stood together--them two young women. I don't know which is
the ansamest. I coodn help comparing them; and I coodnt help comparing
myself to a certing Hannimle I've read of, that found it difficklt to
make a choice betwigst 2 Bundles of A."

"That ungrateful beest Fitzwarren--my oan man--a feller I've maid
a fortune for--a feller I give 100 lb. per hannum to!--a low bred
Wallydyshamber! HE must be thinking of falling in love too! and treating
me to his imperence.
"He's a great big athlatic feller--six foot i, with a pair of black
whiskers like air-brushes--with a look of a Colonel in the harmy--a
dangerous pawmpus-spoken raskle I warrunt you. I was coming ome
from shuiting this hafternoon--and passing through Lady Hangelina's
flour-garding, who should I see in the summerouse, but Mary Hann
pretending to em an ankyshr and Mr. Fitzwarren paying his cort to her?
"'You may as well have me, Mary Hann,' says he. 'I've saved money. We'll
take a public-house and I'll make a lady of you. I'm not a purse-proud
ungrateful fellow like Jeames--who's such a snob ('such a SNOB' was his
very words!) that I'm ashamed to wait on him--who's the laughing stock
of all the gentry and the housekeeper's room too--try a MAN,' says
he--'don't be taking on about such a humbug as Jeames.


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